You Are the Moon - Preface

When my mom was terminally ill, we had our quiet moments of knowing what she would miss when she was gone. We knew she would not live to see me love a child the way she loved me, and that we would not share those moments of bursting joy that are so unique to the blessing of new life, baby wonder, and silly toddler sentences. During the hardest weeks of treatment, I asked her what fueled her. She said she didn’t have a bucket list; all she wanted was to be with me. She wanted to continue to watch my life unfold. She wanted to see me experience the most gratifying thing she had known—being a mother. When she passed, I told a dear friend that I wanted to have a child, a daughter, so I could recreate that connection and pass on all her love to that child. I knew if I spoke to a baby, I would hear my mother’s voice. If I looked down at a baby in awe, I would feel the way my mother looked at me, and she could see my child through my eyes. 

 

Two years later, I was pregnant. I started buying the books that my mom read to me when I was little. I remembered the adventures we had together in those pages, and it comforted me. Then I looked for books about the connection between a child and a late grandparent, and what I found—or rather didn’t find—increased my sadness. There were books about children baking cookies with grandma and books to help children who were missing beloved grandparents they had known. But there wasn’t anything to help a child understand the grandparent they never knew, someone who loves them powerfully and whom they will never get to meet. So, I wrote my own. You Are the Moon is about the omnipresence of a late grandparent who watches over a child and how the essence of that grandparent bestows the child with wisdom, direction, and strength.